“No, You don’t understand”

When I arrived, my sister said “ok, I have to get to work, if you feel like doing something tech oriented, you could hook up the TV or the phone.” She gestured at the TV table, an old grey table which held the TV, a bunch of cables and various arcane boxes plugged into one anothere, including the internet router slash modem, which had cables of different types attached. The power strip on the floor was completely populated.

Glad for the vote of confidence, I had to tell her I’ve never attached a TV to the cable before.

So eventually I got started on the phone.

First I put in 4 AA batteries, which I guess run the unreadable LCD display which is now kaput on this 20-year-old phone. Then I plugged the phone into an ancient phone jack on the answering machine. Nothing. I unplugged the phone answering machine and plugged in the phone into where it was. Same nothing.

So much for that. But, I wanted to call out & my cellphone didn’t get service next to the lake, so I tried to get back my Skype credit so I could use Skype. Microsoft had taken it away a couple of days earlier, saying I had not used it in 180 days (nor indeed for the past several years), but that it would be easy to get it back. This turned out to be untrue, as the simple place to click no longer exists in the current Skype version.

Finally I did succeed in calling with Zoom, since Facetime didn’t work over the local WiFi.

Later on

Later on, I plugged in the cable box and re-connected various gazintas and gazoutas in the video cabling with the result that, when I actually turned on the cable box (vital step) video appeared on the TV. No one watched anything in the week and a half I was there – at least not while I was awake. Success on both counts: it worked, and I didn’t have to listen to it.

Finally at last!

So, my sister said, have you hooked up the phone? No, I said, it’s a voice-line phone, and this is an internet router.

“What about plugging it into the router?” she said.

“No, it’s the wrong type of plug for that,” I said. “It’s an ethernet plug”.

“Well,” she said, “What about this little icon of a phone here next to the socket?”

“No no, you don’t understand,” I said. “That’s for an internet phone. I have one of those on my desk, but I didn’t bring it with me. These are completely different systems. You can try it if you want, but it won’t work”

She plugs in the old phone, and picks up the receiver.

Dial tone.

(actual electrical wiring held up by an oak tree)

--- title: "'splaining" author: "George Girton" date: "2022-06-21" categories: [analysis] image: "IMG_7019_BrownMurmurated.png" --- # "No, You don't understand" When I arrived, my sister said "ok, I have to get to work, if you feel like doing something tech oriented, you could hook up the TV or the phone." She gestured at the TV table, an old grey table which held the TV, a bunch of cables and various arcane boxes plugged into one anothere, including the internet router slash modem, which had cables of different types attached. The power strip on the floor was completely populated. Glad for the vote of confidence, I had to tell her I've never attached a TV to the cable before. ![Brown Marmorated Stinkbug](IMG_7019_BrownMurmurated.png){ width=50% } So eventually I got started on the phone. First I put in 4 AA batteries, which I guess run the unreadable LCD display which is now kaput on this 20-year-old phone. Then I plugged the phone into an ancient phone jack on the answering machine. Nothing. I unplugged the phone answering machine and plugged in the phone into where it was. Same nothing. So much for that. But, I wanted to call out & my cellphone didn't get service next to the lake, so I tried to get back my Skype credit so I could use Skype. Microsoft had taken it away a couple of days earlier, saying I had not used it in 180 days (nor indeed for the past several years), but that it would be easy to get it back. This turned out to be untrue, as the simple place to click no longer exists in the current Skype version. Finally I did succeed in calling with Zoom, since Facetime didn't work over the local WiFi. ### Later on Later on, I plugged in the cable box and re-connected various gazintas and gazoutas in the video cabling with the result that, when I actually turned on the cable box (vital step) video appeared on the TV. No one watched anything in the week and a half I was there -- at least not while I was awake. Success on both counts: it worked, and I didn't have to listen to it. ### Finally at last! So, my sister said, have you hooked up the phone? No, I said, it's a voice-line phone, and this is an internet router. "What about plugging it into the router?" she said. "No, it's the wrong type of plug for that," I said. "It's an ethernet plug". "Well," she said, "What about this little icon of a phone here next to the socket?" "No no, you don't understand," I said. "That's for an internet phone. I have one of those on my desk, but I didn't bring it with me. These are completely different systems. You can try it if you want, but it won't work" She plugs in the old phone, and picks up the receiver. Dial tone. ![(actual electrical wiring held up by an oak tree)](IMG_7174_TreeWire_W.png){width=50%}